On July 16, Former President Barack Obama made an appearance on IMO, the show that Michelle Obama co-hosts with her brother. The theme was, “Focus on what’s right about young men with Barack Obama,” This episode revolved around the “male loneliness epidemic” and the lack of empathy and kindness, as well as how to raise “emotionally intelligent, competent men.”
Obama emphasized the importance of a diverse network of role models for young men. “By the way, you need that person in your friend group so that if you then have a boy who is gay or nonbinary, or what have you, they have somebody that they can go to, ‘OK, I’m not alone in this,’” he says. “That, I think, is creating community. I know it’s corny, but it’s what they need.”
Backing up this belief, Obama talks a bit about his own experience. One of his key role models was an openly gay professor who taught him “empathy and kindness.” Obama shares, “This professor was out during a time when openly gay folks still weren’t out in life. (He) became one of my favorite professors and was a great guy, and would call me out when I started saying stuff that was ignorant. You need that! To show empathy and kindness.”
His professor, Dr. Lawrence Godlyn, taught Obama during his time at Occidental College (1979-1981), a time when being openly gay was not generally accepted, so for this professor to teach his students this took a lot of courage.
On this episode Obama talks about how a broader social structure enables boys and young men to lean on a variety of mentors. This allows these boys to get past the expectations tied to masculinity and have some empathy and kindness towards those they may not understand as much. This really shows us how important a diverse network of role models is for young men in the U.S. is
For Obama, such relationships are key to helping young men grow beyond rigid ideas of masculinity and build greater emotional awareness.
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