She’s all lashes and latex, the poster child for grown-up theater kids—but behind the pink eyeshadow and punchy pop hooks, Chappell Roan is being labeled something far less glamorous: a mean girl.
The rising queer pop star, whose stage persona feels equal parts drag queen and glitter-punk prom queen, has stirred conversation online—not just about her music, but about her attitude. She’s been called arrogant, combative, even a “bitch.” The question is: Why? And even more importantly—Why now, and why her?
At the 2024 MTV Video Music Awards, a tense moment went viral: a photographer told Roan to “shut the fuck up,” and she fired back without hesitation, “You shut the fuck up!” The clip spread fast. Depending on who you ask, it was either a legendary clapback or proof that she’s “too big for her boots.”
“I don’t want whatever the fuck you think you’re supposed to be entitled to whenever you see a celebrity,” Roan later said in a TikTok video, responding to fans who accused her of being rude in public. “If you see me as a bitch or ungrateful … baby that’s you,” she posted on Instagram.
To be clear, Chappell Roan isn’t the first woman in pop to be called difficult. Taylor Swift has been labeled manipulative. Doja Cat has been called antagonistic. Olivia Rodrigo? Too calculated. But there’s something specific, and particularly telling, about how those labels land on a queer woman rising to icon status.
Roan— who is no stranger to challenging the media—isn’t just a pop star, she’s rapidly becoming a symbol of queer liberation in mainstream music. Her shows feel like gay church; her visuals are theatrical, and her lyrics don’t just nod to queerness—They scream it unapologetically. So what does it mean when that same community turns around and calls her a “mean girl”?
From the rise of Tegan and Sara’s lesbian acoustics in the mid-aughts to JoJo Siwa’s recent coming out, the media has always loved to label queer talent. There’s a kind of Madonna/whore binary in queer pop: You’re either a flawless, grateful, rainbow angel, or you’re a villain. And queer artists, especially women, are rarely afforded the messy middle.
On Reddit threads and queer forums like The L Chat, comments range from, “She’s just arrogant and haughty” to armchair diagnoses: “She has bipolar? I’m not trying to give excuses but maybe that could be why?” On Facebook, one user wrote, “Chappell Roan is a mean girl with extremely negative energy, and I’m tired of pretending she’s not.” Ouch.
And yet, the very same posts often feature users praising her performances, dissecting her makeup looks, or begging for concert tickets. The love/hate dynamic is intense, and maybe that’s the point.
The bitch archetype is changing, even if a bit slowly. There’s power in the label of “bitch”—especially when it’s reclaimed. But in Roan’s case, the term is still often used to diminish. We’re uncomfortable with a queer woman asserting boundaries or saying “no” without a smile. If a cis artist snapped back at a photographer or set firm boundaries with fans, they would be praised as “no-nonsense” or “authentic.” For Chappell Roan? She’s just another diva.
“I think I have a strong personality,” Roan has said in interviews. “I’ve always been like that.” Maybe that’s not something to fix. Maybe it’s something to watch and learn from.
We talk a lot about letting women be messy. But what about queer women? Can a rising queer icon be complicated, confrontational, or even (gasp!) unlikable? Or do we only want our gay pop girls if they’re safe and smiling? What happens when they bite back?
Authenticity only comes when queer role-models can actually do just that, model. And that means modeling the whole spectrum of queer identity and emotion—even the unpleasant and messy parts.
Chappell Roan is loud, strange, theatrical, and yes, sometimes abrasive. But isn’t that exactly what makes her powerful? She’s not here to make us comfortable. She’s here to make us feel something. Even if that something isn’t always warm and fuzzy.
And if that makes her a “mean girl”? Well. So be it.
Photo courtesy of social media
