My Queer Across America roadtrip has brought me to Seattle, Washington, where I quickly learn that many of my assumptions about the city are far from reality: The rain isn’t intense, but a constant drizzle; though they dress for comfort, people are very attractive; and, even though Seattle is proud of its reputation of being a liberal hotspot, it’s not a very welcoming city.
After already traveling to a handful of states visiting the queer communities in each city, I can hear the faint cries of my bank account cursing me. Though traveling is not nearly as expensive as most people think, it’s difficult to generate income while being on the road for as long as I have.
Every couple of months, I have to stay in a city for an extended amount of time so I can get a job to replenish my money. It’s a horrible plan because I never know if I’m going to find one or not. Thankfully, I bartend, and it’s a flexible job, especially since bars constantly hire.
I roam around Capitol Hill, the “queer” neighborhood, though the entire city feels LGBTQ+ friendly. Similar to Portland, the area has a heart-warming amount of queer diversity: nonbinary folks with colorful hair, polycules hanging in groups, trans people holding hands with their partners.
I stop by a few bars to leave résumés, including Cha Cha Lounge, a two-story watering hole with a drag show hosted by Betty Wetter. Though the lip sync numbers are fun, it’s the banter on the microphones between the queens that really sells the show.
I notice that the audience is not the usual attendees of drag shows. The majority of the crowd are cishet people. There’s even a group of straight bros in the corner shouting to each other while the entertainment is performing on stage. In another corner, there’s a group of women hosting a bachelorette party, dancing while Betty is trying to speak. She finally addresses the crowd, calling them a “zoo of straight people.”
I’m always welcoming of straight women in queer spaces, especially if it’s more comfortable for them than hetero bars, but not if they’re going to be disrespectful and try to make the space all about themselves.
I continue to the next bars in hopes of finding queer spaces that haven’t been infiltrated. Pony is a small dive bar with a perfect location in the middle of a fork in the road that overlooks the street. Next, I stop by Diesel, a dive bar that caters to the leather and bear community.
Finally, I end up at Queer/Bar, the trendiest venue in the area. Though I much prefer dive bars, this spot catches my attention. It’s spacious with a long runway that hosts drag shows. I also love the bold lettering of “Queer/Bar” proudly standing out front, unapologetically declaring it a queer space. Most importantly, it’s full of LGBTQ+ people.
The bartender informs me that bars in the area typically promote from within and rarely hire people from outside. I protest, saying that all the places I’d dropped résumés off to said they were indeed hiring, and that they would contact me for an interview.
“That’s the ‘Seattle freeze,’” the bartender laughed. “Locals are passive and tend to stick to their cliques and avoid confrontation.” I don’t want to believe this, but over the next month, I notice how true it is. Seattleites seem friendly initially, but it’s more of a front. They smile and exchange surface-level conversation, but it’s difficult to get any further.
Seattleites may be accepting as individuals but, as a community, everything feels more performative. People here get angry if you use emojis that don’t match your skin tone, post “BLM” on their social media without actually supporting the community, and use LGBTQ+ spaces while voting against trans rights. They do all of this because of the visibility rather than genuinely trying to help the queer community through action.
Despite not receiving any calls for interviews, I recognize Seattle is still a lot more accepting of queer people compared to other cities, and I do recommend it as both a place to visit and to live. However, it’s good to know what you’re getting into, and that it might be difficult to find a warm part of the community.
LGBTQ+ areas continue to surprise me on my Queer Across America road trip. Join me next week as I venture across the border to Vancouver to see a Canadian punk band and explore The Great White North’s queer communities.
A map of many of the queer businesses around the U.S. It’s a work in progress as I’m focusing on queer-owned businesses rather than just queer-friendly ones.
Photos courtesy social media and London Alexander’s private collection
