Tears, queers and Fashion Week

I’ve just returned from the spring 2013 fashion shows in New York City. The experience was extremely empowering; I was able to mingle, socialize and witness the mayhem of this big city event.

I’ve been in the process of launching my new website TheLesbianSocialite.com, which has been my passion project building a place for the stories I uncover and the people I meet. This year I wasn’t attending Fashion Week as just Robyn Vie-Carpenter (as I had previously), I was attending as ‘The Lesbian Socialite for Out Front.’

I loved being so blatantly lesbian in such a big arena, and for the first time, I felt like I could truly embrace my environment, because I now have a title and place for who I am, and what I do.

So there I was at Fashion Week, and although I am a columnist and writer for an LGBT publication, coming in and being recognized as “The Lesbian Socialite” put things in an entirely new space.

In fashion, people are used to this display of gayness. A large number of male designers in the business are gay men. There have also been some well-known drag queens in the fashion community in New York City.

These fabulously gay fashion folks often raise money through DIFFA, AmFAR, ACRIA; all AIDS organizations that receive their money from the fashion industry  that was devastatingly affected at the beginning of the AIDS crisis.

Although fashionistas are used to the idea of gay, they are still pretty detached from the L portion of the LGBT acronym.

It was so freeing and fabulous being a big ole lesbian in the middle of everything fashion, and people were extremely receptive to it.

One woman I met almost started crying. She said she was so glad to see me being fully myself right out there in front of everybody. The look she gave me, full of admiration, empowered me even more. Yet, being me has always been the easiest thing I’ve ever done and the only thing that reminds me of my authenticity as a human.

Being a part of Fashion Week, and not being in the industry, helped me realize that this is actually the perfect place for me to be the person I have become: A commentator. A commentator with a very specific agenda: to seek out all things queer.

For some, my queer or lesbian perspective was welcomed, and a few times it was not. But I am an LGBT journalist, not a fashion critic. I look for the beauty in everyone and am most interested in the gay-angle, or social differences that become apparent because of different cultures and lifestyles.

Perhaps what we all look for is a bit of validation from those we respect. Valerie Steele, a big deal in the fashion industry – curator and author – welcomed me with warmth and camaraderie while I was at her exhibit at the Fashion Institute of Technology called ‘A Queer History in Fashion.’ The exhibit explained the contributions of the LGBT community in the world of fashion. I was so touched, feeling free to be myself. I hugged Steele, and she hugged me right back.