Sweetening The Deal

Dear Shanna,


I love giving blow jobs, no doubt about that. However, sometimes my guy’s semen smells and tastes a little funky. I don’t want to insult him by telling him, but do you have any tips on how to sweeten the pot a little?

Turning Up the Taste Factor, Denver.

Dear Turning Up the Taste,

So here’s the deal about bodily fluids that come out of anyone’s genitals: People taste the way they’re supposed to taste. However, various things can impact and change this flavor, regardless of someone’s sex or gender. Here are a few tips on how to make these fluids a little sweeter!

Make sure to keep hydrated. If someone isn’t hydrated enough, body fluids can get thicker, which makes any smell or taste more pronounced. When someone is dehydrated, their body will focus on using the existing amount of fluid for necessary bodily functions, and contrary to popular belief, ejaculation isn’t on the first-round list of necessary functions to take care of. More water in your system thins out fluids, among many other benefits.

What you eat can sweeten the load. While people frequently quote the benefits of pineapple, any citrus-y fruit will do you just as well lemon, lime, orange, grapefruit, heck, even a tangelo! Juice them, peel them, put them in drinks. Citrus will help with flavors down below, for both you and your partner.

What you eat can do more than just make you taste better – it can also add bitter and other less-than-desirable flavors too. Garlic is on the fence; if you love the flavor of garlic, it can be a turn on, but others prefer to abstain from it before sex. On the other hand, foods like cream, broccoli, asparagus, etc., definitely create bitter tastes between your legs. Think ahead when planning your pre-date dinners.

Alcohol in large quantities can also add not so great flavors. It can also dehydrate you, giving you/your partner a one-two punch of not-so-much deliciousness. Drink in moderation or not at all, at least if you’re planning on getting some below the belt action.

Hit the showers! We sweat and lose skin cells as day, so if you’re worried about how you or your partner might smell or taste, start your tryst with a rinse. You’ll both know that the other is so fresh and so clean…plus, it’s a great way to get some foreplay started.

Consider staying away from fettuccine alfredo with the broccoli side, and consider a pineapple juice mojito (light on the rum) a few hours before it’s time to go down, and both you and your partner should be good to go. If it still seems to be an issue, consider some of Sliquid’s fantastic line of glycerin-free, paraben-free (and of course, sugar-free) flavored lubes like pink lemonade or cherry vanilla, and keep on sucking on.

Best of luck!

Shanna.