From the author who brought you Modern Love comes a story that proves that coming-of-age stories have no age limit. Suzette Mullen brings forward her coming out story with The Only Way Through Is Out. Following her journey as she comes out to her family, ex-husband, and friends, Mullen leads us through the tumultuous and rewarding experience of how she embraced her identity as a queer woman.
The reality for many queer women and afab individuals is growing up in a pool of heteronormativity. They are raised and told all their lives that they’ll meet Mr. Right one day, get married, and have a nice little nuclear family. Such sentiments lead to shame and confusion when their inner thoughts and emotions are the opposite of what they’ve been told to feel.
Suzette Mullen visits these thoughts and expands upon them, sharing that, “After the initial euphoria of coming out, reality set in and I experienced bouts of deep grief, which I initially misinterpreted as evidence that leaving my marriage had been a grave mistake … What I’ve come to believe is that leaving a marriage and an entire life like I did can be the right choice and you can still grieve what you left behind. Joy and grief can co-exist. It’s important to allow yourself to feel all the feels.”
While coming out can be stressful, there is beauty in it as well. Mullen showcases this as she talks about the memories made during this hectic time of her life, growing to understand herself more deeply, parting with her husband, and confessing to the woman she had been in love with for years. Mullen is highly relatable and perfectly conveys her story of losing something that was important to her in order to gain something that can never be replaced—getting to know herself.
Images courtesy of Suzette Mullen
