Single and Looking: Local lesbians and gays on love and dating

This is part of Out Front’s June 20 Cover Story – A jungle out there: How lesbians and gays find love and dating

Scott Bates, 31, Gay male

Dates: Men
Occupation: Land Surveyor

“I find that dating in the LGBT community is difficult, because some of the people I’ve met seemed more interested in finding the ‘next best thing’ rather than building good foundations. I have always been single. Dating and relationships haven’t been a primary focus. I generally focus all my energy on the things I pursue so that I give them their proper attention, but now I’m ready to focus on seriously meeting someone.

I meet people online, which has proven to be an ill-dating pool for me. I’m looking to date with an emphasis on ‘LTR’s, and I’m optimistic. Even if someone doesn’t pan out, it gives me the chance to learn about myself. I’m a good guy, with a big heart.”

Timothy Patrick Gaudette, 47, Gay man

Occupation: Chairman of the Denver Gay & Lesbian Chamber of Commerce
Dates: Men
Single for: 7 years

“I meet people through friends, dining out, at community and business events, skiing/boarding, outdoor activities. I’m really optimistic, at this point. Life has been very good lately, so why not?

In a partner, I’m seeking a guy close to my age or older, in relatively good shape, smart/intelligent. I’m looking for someone with things in common, but definitely would like to have some individual interests of our own. I’m looking for dating for sure, and friends at least!”

Marsha Hoffman, “40-something and still looking good,” Lesbian woman

Dates: Women
Occupation: Vemma Brand Partner
Single for: 1 year, 5 months

“Do lesbians really date? You know that line about lesbians – in my experience, you meet someone, hook up right away and have an instant family. I have not dated since I moved to Denver from Dallas a year ago; the women I’m attracted to are already taken! I have found it somewhat difficult to connect here. I generally meet people at social events networking, sporting events and volunteer opportunities.

I’ve done the situation where I’ve dated women who are already in relationships – it doesn’t work out well. If it does take waiting, I’m good with that, meeting a lot of women and developing close friendships. I am looking for honest, bright, witty, feminine, athletic lesbian or bi woman for dating leading to LTR. I’m optimistic about the dating world, there are lots of women out there and I haven’t met them all.”

Cody James Shafer, 24, Gay male

Dates: Men
Occupation: Program Coordinator at the Denver ELEMENT
Single for: 18 months

“I’ve tried online dating but I still find that my most successful moments come from meetings by chance through mutual friends, shared interests, or just locking eyes across the room.

I’ve been dating since I was 16. I’ve found that when you embody confidence and really know yourself it is easier to find what you want. I’ve had a couple of long-term serious relationships and I get a great deal of satisfaction out of that level of intimacy. There are great guys everywhere – you just have to be patient and find them. The rewards are worth it.

I tend to like guys who are taller than me, fair-skinned, with light but striking features. If he’s up for a weekend road trip to camp in the mountains that is a definite plus and if he doesn’t mind listening to NPR on the way than that is even better! Beyond that an interest in current events, politics, community engagement, art, and music will go a long way with me.”

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Send a message to one of these singles! Send an email to Holly Hatch, Holly@outfrontonline.com and we’ll pass it on!