The top 10 definitive superheroes to ever exist according to Out Front’s Rob Barger

Though there are many ways to demonstrate power, some people are simply better at it than others.  Granted, those same people tend to make all of their fashion choices using spandex, so they lack a level of professionalism and view of reality than those power players being honored at the Oct. 5, Power Party.

Regardless, here is a definitive list of some of the most powerful superheroes to ever exist.

10. Daredevil

Sure, his movie was terrible.  I think we can all safely assume that Ben Affleck regrets this disparaging mark on his resume, especially now that he is to portray the next Batman. But Daredevil, the character is a badass. Not only is he one of the unluckiest guys around (blind, many dead girlfriends, episodes in prison) but he still has the power to rally and beat up bad guys. He is the definition of “handi-capable”.

9. Iron Man

My own prejudices want me to place Iron Man closer to the No. 1 spot, but all I’ve ever done is see the movies. Apparently in comics, Tony Stark is still a playboy on-and-off again millionaire, but some of his battles are fighting his alcoholism. It makes a statement, but when do we see superheroes battling cancer or diabetes? It’s OK Tony, you’ll always be Robert Downey Jr. to me.

8. The Flash
This superhero has always been the subject of envy for those who have thighs that chafe as soon as they start a jog. He is fast enough to run across water and scale tall buildings. He can even move his molecules fast enough to pass through solid objects. The dude owns his own “cosmic treadmill” which allows him to run so fast that he can travel through time. Please tell me I’m not the only one who wonders what he’s like in bed.

7. The Green Lantern:

In yet another superhero movie mistake, Ryan Reynolds took on the role of Green Lantern, a magic guy with a ring that can draw shapes in the air. I imagine he’s great at parties, and having a bunch of pals in the intergalactic police force can’t be too bad.

6. Captain America

His first comic depicted him punching Hitler in the face. I imagine Hitler wasn’t happy about it. What’s more, he is played in the movies by Chris Evans, so…

5. Spiderman

Bitten by a radioactive spider, Peter Parker swings through the air on webs, inadvertently kills his uncle by deciding not to pursue justice, and trades his marriage to Mary Jane to the devil. Complicated and luckless, Spiderman continues to save the people of New York all while trying to find a work-life balance. Without a doubt, Andrew Garfield’s butt makes a better Spiderman than Tobey Maguire’s. No Spidey Sense needed.

4. Wolverine

The toughest fighter in all fiction would have to be Wolverine. Near-indestructible, he never shies away from a fight. He has a lot of anger issues, but usually fights on the side of good. At one point in the comic series, Wolverine goes up against the Hulk.  Didn’t even flinch.

3. Batman

Hidden inside his batcave, Bruce Wayne defends the city that his deceased family helped build. His vast fortune aids his ninja-like skills and makes Batman a formidable opponent to any evil-doer. One thing about Batman that has always spoken to me is the Bat Signal. What I wouldn’t do to have some sort of symbol thrown up into the sky every time someone needs me. My roommate needs me to do dishes? Well she better be flashing signals up on my ceiling otherwise she’s getting ignored.

2. Wonder Woman

If I had a lasso of truth, I would never speak to people without wrapping it around their bodies. I guess her brute will power strength is what makes her such a strong hero. That and the fact that she flies around in an invisible plane, is able to block bullets, and has a bazillion other powers. She fights for peace, love, and sexual equality. You go, girl.

1. Superman:

 
He is the greatest superhero with the greatest amount of terrible movies created. Remember Brandon Routh? No? Me neither. But that’s part of what makes Superman so great. Able to survive great lapses in writers’ judgement! Superman gets the No. 1 spot by default. The nerdiest of readers will feel that this is a cheap and easy answer and they aren’t wrong. But there’s just no beating superman. Sure, if you have an old kryptonite laser cannon sitting in your garage that you want to loan to Wonder Woman, then we’re talking power struggle,but if you don’t have one, Superman will crush your entire body into a diamond. An ugly brown diamond. Granted, you’ll also have to find the real Superman out there. Good luck with that.

I think it’s important to remember that you don’t have to have superpowers to  be a superhero. On Oct. 5, come and see some real heroes be recognized for their super-and-yet-not-so-super power. Our second annual Power Party promises to be even bigger and better than our first. Tickets on sale here. Use discount code “superhero” to save 15 percent off your tickets.

Check out the real superheroes here: