Panel Voices: Has the LGBT movement gotten beyond the ‘privacy’ argument?

Jo Niblock and Cecil Bethea weigh in on this week’s question.

Jo Niblock

Interestingly enough, when I first read this question it seemed somewhat foreign to me. I just hadn’t heard the expression for such a long time. From my perspective we are far away from this argument. Not that it’s not at the foundation of everything we fight for each day, but the focus is no longer sexually focused – it’s about equality, marriage, raising children, and mostly being able to love who we want to love, how and when we want to love them. The LGBT community has so many wonderfully strong examples of where drive and determination can lead us. Many have sacrificed and fought in this war to be equal. The war carries on, however the battle for our bedrooms we have won. I believe the world has realized what we do in our bedrooms will never be regulated successfully and it’s a losing battle. We have embraced the power and sanctity of our bedrooms as an LGBT community. Most days my bedroom feels like the safest place in this world. There is no judgment inside those four walls. There is the peacefulness of sleep. There is love made there.

What I am so encouraged by is the expansion of our community, who is now finding focus on protecting the rights of everyone along the LGBT spectrum. This includes developing resources for the aging community, building and educating our youngest members, transgendered support, marriage equality and LGBT parental rights. We have moved way beyond the bedroom. We teach children, we are emergency service workers, we are CEO’s, and we are famous actors, athletes and musicians. We even hold congressional seats. We understand our power now is not what we do in our bedrooms, it’s what we continue to accomplish outside.

Jo Nibblock is a corporate fraud supervisor, photographer and transgender male who lives in Denver.

Cecil Bethea

I should hope so. The repeal of the Defense of Marriage Act is still in the future and should be our next goal. There are two cases currently winding their way through the courts that involve DOMA, and already two federal appeals courts have decided in our favor. Now we shall have to see what the Supreme Court does.

The French have had a much different situation – to have a relationship recognized legally in France, the couple can have a civil ceremony for a civil solidarity pact. For those couples, if they want a church wedding, that is no business of the state. This separation of the legal aspects from the religious has made it easier for them to enact gay marriage.

We Americans have had difficulties making the separation. The case in New York involves an inheritance tax levied by the Federal Government. The survivor of a straight marriage would not have to pay an inheritance tax whereas the survivor of a gay marriage in New York does. The I.R.S., not recognizing the gay marriage, has levied a whopping tax on the estate.

My optimism of our success is high, but then my record as a prophet is poor. I am thinking that Justice Kennedy would join the liberals resulting in a 5 to 4 decision in our favor, which is all want or need. With my optimism running amok, I am thinking Chief Justice Roberts might remember that the Constitution is to protect the citizens from the government. Another facet of my optimism concerns the three conservative justices: Thomas, Sacilia and Alioto. Any or all of them could write a favorable opinion based upon conservative principles, but that would be pathological daydreaming.

What will be the reaction amongst gays when we win? No doubt crowds will celebrate. Speakers will orate about a new day a-coming. Booze will flow like milk and honey. Gays without number will line up to buy marriage licenses. A month or two later, some will line up to file divorce papers. After all: We are gay, but also Americans.

Cecil Bethea was raised in the South before joining the Air Force and now calls himself a ‘Westerner of Southern extraction.’