Out And Proud On the Highway: LGBTQ Truck Drivers Build A Family On The Road
Founded in 2019, The LGBTQ Truck Drivers Network welcomes LGBTQ+ drivers within trucking and outside trucking with a goal of education, Diversity, Acceptance & Leading by example. I got the opportunity to meet with the founder Bobby Loy and group member Ashleigh Lewis to discuss The Network as well as challenges, philosophy and the journey to what is now a strong network of LGBTQ+ truckers who call each other family.
Bobby Loy, the founder of the LGBTQ Truckers Network, was born and raised in West Virginia, in a family where truck driving runs deep. Bobby led by example of his father and grandfather who were long-haul truck drivers. Although Loy came from trucking lineage, he faced many personal challenges including strains on his family life when coming out. Bobby often reflects on his parents’ growth and their learning to accept him and his community.
When asked why he decided to start the network Bobby remark, “When I came into trucking, I didn’t expect to see a large community of LGBTQ+ people. In my mind, I didn’t think there would be a large group or that there were people like me out there. I just didn’t put two and two together. But after being in the industry, and even through Trucking School, meeting trans drivers and meeting gay and lesbian drivers and just so many different people, I realized really fast that there’s a lot of drivers here that, you know, just needed representation.” People tend to have one idea of what a truck driver looks like, big, male, straight, scary? When really, just like any job, there is a unique mix of people behind the wheel who are looking for community, and Bobby created just that.
When first starting the network, Bobby got a message on their page asking for a call. “He called, and that’s when I knew we were doing something special. He said, ‘I’ve lived with my partner for 26 years, and I’ve been trucking for 26 years,’ and he said, ‘I’m not out to anyone, and I haven’t been out.’ He said, ‘I watched you and your husband, and I watched you on the page, and you’re going to amusement parks, sharing your pictures with the dogs, going across the country, and just sharing life.’ He was like, ‘I came out to my family.’ I said, ‘What?’ And he goes, ‘I came out to my family; I just came out.’” At this moment, Bobby knew there were others out there who needed a helping hand, and so he got to work.
First Bobby helped to organize existing LGBTQ+ trucking groups on Facebook to get an official organization going and help share an official voice. And so, through registration, the LGBTQ Truckers Network became an official nonprofit organization. Bobby shares, “There’s people out here that are having surgeries and healing up from surgeries while driving down the highway, and they, you know, they’ll put a big hoodie on when they do breast augmentation or facial feminization surgeries. And I just couldn’t imagine. There’s people out here that’s transitioning in a truck, like, so the visibility and everything, the people were already here, so we just took it a step farther.” Bobby faced the beginning of the network head-on with a can-do attitude, starting with attending trucking events and Pride events. Now the page has more than 19,000 members.
Ashleigh Lewis, current member and social media manager, found the page when she had just come out as trans. Ashleigh was not a driver when she first joined the page but was interested and grew up around truck drivers. When looking on Facebook for an LGBTQ+ trucking group, she found Bobby’s network and joined the page. Ashleigh says, “I’ve been able to stand up and stand out and just be myself. I really am, like, whether it’s rhinestone jackets and bright, neon-colored jeans, I’m always in, like, Pride stuff. And so I’ve been very visible. Now, with all that visibility, we have broken barriers along the way.”
Ashleigh has experienced many struggles on the path towards education and visibility such as death threats. Ashleigh shares, “I am who I am. I don’t change for anybody. We’ve had death threats. I’ve had people say that they were going to kill me. I’ve had people say they were going to take me out of the events and, like, drag me out and beat the hell out of me.” Ashleigh was raised to lead with respect, straight or gay alike, and ultimately has seen friendships across borders, sexuality, and social groups.
When asked what the feature looks like for the network, Bobby says they hope to expand and grow as an organization, being out and proud on the roads and creating visibility for the LGBTQ+ community. When asked if he has any words of advice for our readers, Bobby says, “At the end of the day, I just want people to be happy and live their lives as their true authentic selves. If you’re happy with yourself, that’s all that matters.”
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