On “Dad Bods” And Bears
IT’S TIME, LADIES AND GENTLEMAN. Time to address the “dad bod.” I couldn’t escape this trend any longer, one that cornered me with every think-piece and listical of somewhat paunchy male celebrities in swimsuits. The only question that I have is why? Why the fixation?
Kelsey Lindsey
Is this psychological, a way for the mostly-straight girls perpetuating the trend to fulfill some deep, Freudian desire?
Or is this a defensive mechanism, a way for men to get a break from the gym and spend their afternoons in guilt-free bliss, beer and pizza in hand?
But most importantly, why now? Framing it from a gay perspective, this “breakthrough” way of thinking seems somewhat outdated.
What took so long for us as a society to finally shift our gaze to the male physique? And even then, we give it a happy, be-yourself mantra so often left out of society’s description of the ideal womanly body. While it took years for a visible counterculture to arise to the stick-thin supermodel expectations for women in years past, society as a whole seemed to leapfrog over those societal pressures for men.
Saying this, I do know that gay culture often has rigid expectations for the male body. Gay men — at least gay men siloed into the sometimes-uncreative groups of gay society — have seen pressures in the past to, at the very least, look good with your shirt off.
But enter the Bear, and this expectation, perhaps a prelude to the dad bod, was suddenly softened. Accepting of average-to-overweight men, fuzzy bellies, and overall paunch, Bears have been proudly showing off their hairy chests and groomed mane with gusto for years. While still affixed with their own stereotypes and expectations, bears gave these “dad bod” dudes a pass at the perfect body well before the female college student that coined the term was even born.
So why did it take the rest of the society years to catch up to this man-loving acceptance? That’s a loaded question, one that would probably require some deep sociological investigation and study.
I’ll offer my hypothesis, albeit with the precursor that it comes as a pure guess: Perhaps because gay people were already societal outliers, it was easier to be yourself as part of the gay crew. While you’ll find judgment in any crowd, the term “dad bod” wasn’t needed, seeing that gay culture had already accepted this body type years ago. Like up-and-coming neighborhoods and the best clubs, the gays got to the dad bod first.
Time will only tell if they hang onto it.
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