Medical myth-busting: marijuana edition!

One of the more frustrating elements of analyzing marijuana in a medicinal context is the lack of… well, stuff to analyze.

Facebook memes shared by the thousands tell us pot is good for everything from PTSD to killing pain, while others tell us we’re on the slippery slope to SchizVille and cancer. And who are we to scoff, as though we know without a shred of uncertainty exactly what it is that pot can do? With laws being what they are, most of our friendly neighborhood scientists have been running into brick walls of red tape trying to catch a ride on the Pineapple Express for our benefit. That said, there are a few saplings of wisdom sprouting from the medical journals of those who’ve managed to break barriers and scrutinize the skunk under a microscope. Let’s examine some of their findings and bust a few myths, shall we?

Marijuana and the lungs

“Smoking cigarettes causes pulmonary dysfunction. That means smoking pot does too!”

Yeah, not so fast. Researchers at the University of Alabama recently sifted through the data collected when more than 5,000 cigarette smokers and their counterparts, the weed tokers, agreed to have their lung functions monitored for 20 years. The researchers used two straightforward tests: one to test the amount of air a person can breathe out in one second (gauging their overall speed) and another to test the amount of air a person can breathe out after taking a maximally deep breath (gauging their overall volume). The tobacco, as previous studies have shown, had an adverse effect on both the speed and the volume of the smokers’ output, while the pot smokers (particularly those who smoked no more than a single joint per day) actually showed increase in both criteria.

“What about cancer?”

To date, there’s been no definitive link that marijuana is carcinogenic on its own, despite many attempts to prove otherwise. In fact, after carefully monitoring nearly 65,000 pot-puffin’ patients, researchers at the Kaiser Permanente Medical Care Program in San Francisco concluded that the subjects were not at increased risk for cancer in any of the demographics studied. Their conclusion states that marijuana “was also not associated with tobacco-related cancers or with cancer of the following sites: colorectal, lung, melanoma, prostate, breast, [and] cervix.” Put that in your pipe and smoke it!

Pain, the brain and Mary Jane

“You stoner bums are going against nature!”

It would appear that humans dig the wacky tobacky because hey: we’re gettin’ spaced, right? Imagine the frowning among the throng of judgey t-totalers to learn that not only is marijuana responsible for zero cases of overdose, but that humans have built-in cannabinoid receptors in our cute little noggins that were designed to pick up on the playful parsley! Turns out, this dashing little addition to our nervous system becomes especially active when we partake and orders a portion of our pain receptors to clock out and take a break. The news is good for those suffering from diabetes, HIV/AIDS, cancer, spinal cord injury and many other devitalizing conditions, so who are the haters to wag a finger while we shake what Mother Nature gave us?

“Yeah, well it still can cause deterioration of your brain functions.”

On the contrary! Its use in patients with Alzheimer’s revealed some uplifting findings. The Scripps Research Institute in California observed in awe as THC pumped the brakes on production of the enzyme responsible for the accumulation of amyloid plaque — the disease’s primary marker — in a “considerably superior” manner to approved Alzheimer’s drugs on the market. The researchers concluded that “[c]annabinoids offer a multi-faceted approach by providing neuroprotection and reducing neuroinflammation, whilst simultaneously supporting the brain’s intrinsic repair mechanisms.” In addition, scientists at the California Pacific Medical Center saw the onset of Lou Gehrig’s Disease (which affects the brain stem, among other sites) delayed in patients undergoing experimental treatment with THC, “potentially extending life expectancy and substantially reducing the overall burden of the disease.” And these are just two quick examples from a state that legalized medicinal marijuana! Imagine the possibilities …

“OK, but the paranoia from pot can trigger a mental breakdown.”

So does college algebra and people who drag their feet, I’ve found. To be fair, studies have shown that the psychoactive qualities of THC can cause paranoia and auditory hallucinations (both which are bad news for the mentally fragile), its non-psychoactive “other half” (cannabidiol, or CBD) can modify, and in some cases even diminish, the THC like a concert security guard holding the overzealous wannabe stage-diver at bay. It’s often the case that weed fortified with too much party and too little bouncer causes varying degrees of anxiety in the more sensitive among us, but people who toe the mental illness line should be careful of any script-flipping, both medicinal and recreational.

Hippie lettuce and digestion

The Journal of Physiology and Pharmacology published a study last year centered around pot and the gastrointestinal tract of patients with ulcerative colitis, Crohn’s and Irritable Bowel Disorder, all of which are inflammatory diseases of the tum tum, scientifically speaking. Conclusion: the THC in marijuana works to “protect the lining of the stomach and intestine from injury and accelerate healing from inflammation.” Anecdotally, the nausea and pain of the afflicted are eased with a few puffs of the good stuff.