Dear Denver Cycle Sluts,
Last week I ended up having sex with my best friend. At least he used to be my best friend – we haven’t talked since. Did I mess up? I definitely don’t want to lose our friendship, but I don’t know how to put the genie back in the bottle. Does that mean we should be boyfriends?
– “Friends or benefits?”
Zoey Diddim: To “put the genie back in the bottle” you first get him drunk and then use lots of lube. Friends WITH benefits!
Freeda Fondle: Hell, you’re screwed.
Winnie Bego: Guess the nookie wasn’t good. I’d try ya out, but if it’s bad, I’m not gonna call ya either.
Diane Tolickya: No, it just means that you’re a whore. Now strive harder to become a Slut.
Rolonda Flor: You know you’re a whore when you have to start fu*king your friends cause you ran out of options in your city. Atta girl!
Molotovia Cocktail: Oh Precious, never, never, never sleep with someone you know. Now he’s an ex that you will just have to “hook up with” for an ex-with-benefits Booty Call.
Bea Dazzle: You’re beyond boyfriends. My husband and I have been together for years and haven’t had sex that wasn’t awkward.
Eden Cox: I don’t think I have any friends that I haven’t slept with. Please don’t tell me this is your first?
Sassy Squatch: Oh, Poodle! Time to start looking for a new BFF! If you haven’t talked since you resized his friendship ring, you probably won’t until he has a dry spell and can’t afford the bathhouse.
