When I was young, my father wasn’t around very much. He still isn’t around very much, but I’ve done enough self-reflection to know that his absence had nothing to do with me. On the rare instances when he did visit, however, he would often take us out on his shrimping boat, the Gold Tide. For him, it was an easy way to occupy our time and give us some good memories. For me, it was an escape.
On those lazy summer trips cruising around the Gulf of Mexico, I would sit on the back deck and fantasize. I would imagine a merman would swim up and whisk me away to an underwater fantasy world where I could be free. I spent hours daydreaming about what this underwater world would look like and who I could become if I wasn’t bound by the constraints of life in a small redneck town in North Florida. I needed this escape because the reality is that I was a young, brown, queer child dealing with bullying. I was coming to terms with the fact that I was different and didn’t feel like I fit into the world around me. So I created a new world called Aquatica.
Even though I didn’t know what to call it, I knew I was queer in kindergarten. It was then that I started creating fantasy worlds in my head to escape the harsh realities of life in the Bible Belt. As queer children, we need to be able to feel safe. When you have to spend your entire day masking your true self, tamping down your instincts to be expressive, wild, and free, those instincts need a place to go. I retreated inwards and the fantasy worlds I created in my head became a place where I was unbound by societal mores and able to be whoever, and whatever, I wanted. I was lucky to have a supportive mother to provide for my basic needs, which gave me the privilege to daydream. It is vital that queer children have a safe space to express themselves, even if that space can only exist in their heads.
The same is true for queer adults. Now more than ever, with the maelstrom of anti-queer legislation bombarding us every day, queer adults also need a safe space to create. One of the core reasons I founded Haus of Other was to allow for my community to express themselves through art. As a collective we host crafting nights and create immersive themed costume parties to celebrate the queer community and benefit various charities.
We live in a world that isn’t built to support queer youth. In fact, most people would rather pretend that they don’t exist. Many more people would like to change them. LGBTQ+ children are four times as likely to commit suicide as their cis peers. And 39% of LGBTQ+ people have considered suicide.
That is why it is so important to support queer charities like YouthSeen. Every one of Haus of Other’s immersive theme parties supports a queer charity, and YouthSeen was a very easy choice for Aquatica. YouthSeen provides support services for queer/bipoc youth and their families. They do everything from support groups to training workshops and education. They also provide short-term case management on everything from medical and mental health to housing instability. I didn’t have any queer resources growing up, and part of me wonders if I would be a different person if I had. Luckily I had the support of my family and was able to grow into the gloriously queer person I have become. All I want is for every queer child out there to have that same freedom of expression. Charities like YouthSeen are doing the groundwork to create that future and we must support them in any way we can.
I believe that art should always have meaning. That is why my lion fish costume us so unapologetically queer—it’s a love letter to my inner child. I am proud to be a fully-realized adult, creating an underwater fantasy world that helps support the freedom of children everywhere to live as they choose.
At the end of the day, that is all queer people want. The entire LGBTQ+ agenda is simply that we want the freedom to exist in our full authenticity, look how we want to look, love how we want to love, and empower our future generations with the boundless possibility that we didn’t experience in our childhoods.
This Saturday, when I step into Aquatica at Champagne Tiger, I will know that I’ve done my small part in creating that world for our queer youth. It’s a journey that I intend to be on for the rest of my life.
I invite you to dive in and join me.
Tickets available here.
Photos courtesy of Haus of Other
