Celebrating ‘Superb Owl Sunday’ with the Lesbian Housewyfe

At the abode of the Lesbian Housewyfe, we celebrate Superb Owl Sunday.

Yep. While the majority of Americans gather around the television to watch the overly hyped and laboriously celebrated Super Bowl, Stephanie and I rejoice in the glory that is not watching football.

It’s really not that hard, especially if you live in a home bereft of football fans.

“But the ads!” Some exclaim to me. “Don’t you watch the commercials?”

OK, so I do like a good commercial. And now that I have done a bit of copywriting, I appreciate them more than I used to.

But honey, I have seen commercials, and the Super Bowl commercials show up on television for weeks after the big game. I have missed nothing, and I got to NOT watch football in the process.

Not to brag or anything.

Anyway, with all of the sales on manly meat products for manly men cooking on their manly grills for this celebration of manly football, my mother-in-law snagged a rack of baby back ribs and offered them up for our Superb Owl Sunday get-together.

Here’s where it got tricky. She called my wife, Steph, and asked her if ribs sounded good, and Steph agreed. Usually, when my mother-in-law calls to suggest ribs, that means she’s found a sale on a yummy prepared version. However, over the next couple of days, Stephanie slowly made the realization that her mother would be showing up to our house on Sunday with a raw rack of baby back ribs.

Oh, SHINKY!

Steph scanned the internet, searching for a quick recipe for baby back ribs. Did you know that baby back ribs are not a quick cook?

She discovered multiple recipes calling for low and slow cooking on a grill or in the oven, with times of up to six hours!

As Stephanie cursed the universe for putting these ribs in the view of her mother, I strategized. We still had time. I’d pick up the ribs, and we’d cook them on Saturday. That would be fine. But just before I made the suggestion, she looked at me and said the magic words.

“What about the Instant Pot?”

Stephanie’s stroke left her left side partially paralyzed, which meant that when she returned home after rehab, she needed to find new ways to do her usual activities.

For example, Steph loves her morning cup of coffee. Many years ago, we owned a cafe, and the semi-automatic espresso machine stole her taste buds. After the “Bella Machina” left our lives, her now-vintage ceramic dripper came into daily use, making single cups of coffee to her exacting specifications.

However, the rebellion of her body made the necessary multiple trips to the counter for the pour-over laborious.

That was when Stephanie remembered the French press pot we discovered when we moved into our home. We kept it tucked away just in case a fun brunch required multiple cups for guests.

Yes! Now, single cups of quality coffee required only two trips to the counter! Woohoo!

When I went back to full-time work after her rehab, she wanted to make dinner so I wasn’t coming home and diving straight into the kitchen.

Yep. She’s pretty awesome that way.

However, standing at the counter and chopping with a blade takes too long when balance is impinged by a paralyzed left leg. After all, when you have to steady yourself, suddenly you don’t have enough hands!

One day, a short, fat cylinder with a bladed fan inside caught my eye at the grocery store. Drop veggies into this little contraption and secure the lid. A handle attached to a cord operates the fan, which whirls and chops the vegetables into small bits.

Many, many years ago, we owned a similar, if larger, device that was sold as a “salsa maker.” Just pop your tomatoes, peppers, onions, herbs into the container and whizz, whizz, whizz! Salsa! As Seen on TV!

This little chopper allows Stephanie to whirl onions, carrots, celery, peppers, and other veggies into an easily sautéed size.

Whizz, whizz, whizz! Mirepoix, anyone?

Then, we discovered the electric multi-cooker.

Our friend, Janet Selbe, was the first one to tell Steph about this miracle machine.

The thing about these multi-cookers is that, while they incorporate the normal ability to sauté and then to pressure cook, they also can be used as slow cookers and rice steamers and all sorts of new cool cooking activities. Like pressure cookers do, they cook meat and soup and beans in a ridiculously short period of time. But, unlike traditional pressure cookers, the whole thing works automatically. No worrying about the temperature or the timing or exploding pots.

Plus, with the popularity of these devices, recipes for every food you can imagine have magically appeared across the web. Want a delicious white bean and sausage soup for dinner? Start with dried beans and dinner’s on the table in an hour! A half-hour produces our favorite spicy shredded chicken thighs, perfect for slathering with BBQ sauce or wrapped with small flour tortillas for tacos.

Thus, when confronted with raw baby back ribs … time to pull out the Instant Pot!

Thirty seconds with a search engine produced a recipe. In a little over an hour from the moment, my mother-in-law walked in the door, juicy and tender ribs delighted our bellies. A Superb Owl Sunday Miracle!!!

Speaking of Superb Owl Miracles, I heard that the sheep won the game.

GO SHEEP!

I always love a good, fibery ending!

Especially when I didn’t have to watch football.

#SuperbOwl Meme by LA Bourgeois