Beyond Buffalo: White Supremacy is Not Elsewhere

I’ve given myself a few days to gather my thoughts before diving into this subject matter. As a Black woman, I am exhausted. I am exhausted by the constant presence of white supremacy and racism. It is not lost on me that what happened in Buffalo, New York this past weekend is an act of violence that could happen anywhere.

Out of the 13 people who were shot by 18-year old, white supremacist Payton Gendron, 11 of them were Black. This does not feel like a one-time incident but rather a build up of the harmful rhetoric white supremacy continues to uphold.

As a resident of Denver, Colorado, it is also not lost on me that I am in a majority-white space myself.

When I hear about incidents such as the one in Buffalo, I can’t help but think of the crimes against those in my own city. In the short time I have been in Denver, I have also experienced my own share of prejudices. To be frank, I’ve experienced more racism in the past two months than I have in my almost two years in this city.

One incident, a racist white man in Boulder blatantly screamed at me during an event, primarily with vendors of color. Another incident, a local restaurant here in Denver refused to serve me. They’re reminders that, no matter how settled I am in my new home or any other location, I am still a Black, pansexual woman who cannot escape oppression.

A general feeling of safety is snatched away for Black and Brown folks the moment we are born. Even at young ages, we are told of the risks our melanated skin from our elders. I cannot go to a new location, venue, space, or even the grocery store without question. I do not have that luxury, the freedom, and I never will. Whether I will be at war with microaggressions, blatant discrimination, or the loss of my own life—It depends on the assailant and the day.

And, the bigger question of “Will I receive justice?” Most likely, not. If I were a white man or even a white woman, I know would have better odds.

This does make me wonder how easily susceptible I am to a moment of violence and how easily I can be another name added to list of murdered, Black women, how quickly I will be “Brianna Janae, 26” among a list of my peers. Whether I am being a social justice advocate out in protest or picking up bananas at my local market, I am a target.

As someone who does speak out against violence, discrimination, and various issues, I know that social justice work comes with risk. I know when I’m out at a protest or when I am speaking online, I am putting myself “out there.” Many activists and leaders have lost their lives fighting for the justice of their community. That part is something I am fully aware of, and I am mindful of in those spaces.

However, in moments where I am at ease, where I am in spaces curated for folks of color, where my Black body is just existing, I am still at risk. And I should not be. And I am tired of this being the case. I have consistently seen how disposable Black and Brown bodies are, but I know we deserve more.

I hope this incident in Buffalo brings awareness to those who think we are “past racism,” especially to other LGBTQ folks, white liberals, and all those who think white supremacy doesn’t occur where they live. Because it can.

I deserve to feel that my Black, queer body matters. Yet, the reality is in my lifetime, those who look like me are not safe and may never be—or my children’s lifetime, or their children’s lifetime. But as long as I have air in my lungs, I will never stop advocating. I will never stop the endless prayers for the liberation of my people and the fight against racism.

Let us not forget this country is built on white supremacy and the sweat of my ancestors. And for that, I will never stop fighting, just as those who came before me.

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Identified victims:
Roberta A. Drury, 32, of Buffalo
Margus D. Morrison, 52, of Buffalo
Andre Mackniel, 53, of Auburn, New York
Aaron Salter, 55, of Lockport, New York
Geraldine Talley, 62, of Buffalo
Celestine Chaney, 65, of Buffalo
Heyward Patterson, 67, of Buffalo
Katherine Massey, 72, of Buffalo
Pearl Young, 77, of Buffalo
Ruth Whitfield, 86, of Buffalo
Only surviving victims:
Zaire Goodman, 20, of Buffalo, was treated and released from hospital
Jennifer Warrington, 50, of Tonawanda, New York, was treated and released from hospital
Christopher Braden, 55, of Lackawanna, New York, had non-life-threatening injuries